YOU WON’T BELIEVE ME

Went to pick up my scripts the last week and the pain patch I wear was out of stock but should be in by next Wednesday. I haven’t put one back on since and I only increased my PRN by a pill or two a day. I don’t want to put the patch back on either. Decided to talk to my doctor about DCing the use of it because I already have tried and well I can neuro-reprogram my brain I am sure I did it before.

However, in the time that I was coming off of the patch, my sleep has improved and now up to a consistent 4 hours before waking up. Overall, I was more productive and I’ve gone on an outing I didn’t feel like going on before, I’ve installed a secondary hard drive and reinstalled the dual boot operating system on my computer as well as having restarted from scratch a video project I began working on for over a month ago.

I then completed the channel trailer no once but twice in less than two weeks. Could I have done this before during the height of my treatment or when that device was inside of me HELL NO! Can I now? I believe so.

Yes, I stopped cold turkey. No, I haven’t suffered any adverse symptoms from doing so. Other than I am sleeping a bit more but that isn’t bad because I feel rested. Yes, the pain elevated. Is it intolerable? No, but only because I have experienced worse. As I said I believe I can reprogram my perception as I have before. Takes time, that is all.

It will require me not lazing out and reverting to my old lifestyle ways of what is simply easier because the harder way of doing things hurts so much less in the end. Eating something though it is good in-the-moment is far more painful in the long run from the inflammatory response. It simply isn’t worth it.

I can hear it now… “What is life if you cannot enjoy it!” I do enjoy life but I don’t have to have something that I put into my mouth that makes me go “OMG!” to enjoy a hike, a walk, a movie and I can find something else that I can say “Oh, that IS satisfying!”

What is the difference? Today, I am looking for how to live rather than chasing my tail trying to find the medical cure. Don’t get me wrong I am reading, studying and researching every avenue but I am looking to within the body and how it works rather than taking a pill to stop a symptom that may have a handful of adverse side effects from the use … up to and including death.

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